I’ve had several things happen around me that linked my life to suicide, all of which were out of my control. My brother attempted to take his life as a teenager, unsuccessfully. Unfortunately, a friend of mine succeeded in taking his life. Both of these events touched me in ways I’ve never dreamed of, they were the first few moments in life I truly felt out of control. I felt helpless. It took me years, ten years to be exact, to figure out how to deal with my feelings but I never stopped looking for help and closure. At some point, I realized while I may not be in control of others lives and actions, I AM in control of mine. So, I decided to make the best of what I was given. I took care of myself and my feelings. I reached out to my family and friends and others to talk about things and discuss what happened and how it affected everyone. Then I decided to volunteer with IMALIVE. I thought going into it, it would be for others. However, the other volunteers and the stories from the people I chatted with actually helped me find purpose and find some sort of final closure to a part of my life that I thought I would never have.
Reaching out to others for help in my life has caused me to see myself in a different light. To see that I have the support and the love when and where I need it. I know everyone has their own way to finding help, no two people are the same, but the important thing is that we keep looking for it. Help is there, finding it can be hard, and not every story ends with a happily ever after, but help is always available.